The 2012 Act Three Journey of an Actress/Coach/Writer.

Day 37 Treading Water?

Posted by themirrenlee on 06/02/2012

Treading, not drowning.

Treading water?

That’s what it feels like when a chronic condition flares up, stopping you from doing what you want to be doing – or, indeed, from what you NEED to be doing.

Even though I’m no longer taking it, the side effects I talked about yesterday from the anti inflammatory medication will probably take a few days to recede, so I’m still feeling unable to to do much. I find it very hard to ask for help, so my daughter Sarah knew that I really needed it when I asked her to pick me up a few groceries after she got off work.

The funny thing is, my utter faith in everything happening for a reason was validated even by this small event because it meant that she and her boyfriend, James, had to come over. That led to us being able to share our happiness in person at the fact that they finally got accepted today for a house to rent. They’ve been looking for weeks, and really wanted this particular one, but it took several days for them to get an answer about whether or not they’d been accepted.

The excitement all around was wonderful, and the sense of relief that now they’ll finally be able to move into their own place (James’s parents have been their hosts for many months, and how great they’ve been, but there’s nothing like being independent). They have managed to gather together just about everything they need to set up house, but it’s scattered everywhere among family and friends, and the fact that they can finally put it all together in one place is also a great joy.

I was able to help them with advice and information about the thousands of questions/situations that come up when moving, including some things they needed to know tomorrow before signing the lease. This wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t needed some groceries!

This is the first lease either of them have ever signed; James has been living at home and Sarah has only lived in share situations. I’ve always said that the fact that practical every day life skills are not taught as a major component of the final years of high school (including how to negotiate the details of looking for a place to live) is educational negligence. It’s another Logic Vaccum to me.

So even with the side effects limiting what I could do about today’s To Do list, which made me feel like I was treading water, I found out that I actually did accomplish something after all – I helped Sarah and James. What a nice surprise.

Sometimes our accomplishments come in small, unexpected, but no less important ways. And sometimes we just have to tread water. I think this is very important for people with chronic conditions, in particular, to remember because we often feel so constricted by our limitations that we get depressed. Everyone has a different path to follow, and even when the directions seem confusing, if we have faith that we’ll eventually get there in the end, we can relax and enjoy the journey.

This is a new aspect of my own Journey this year – not getting stressed when it feels like I’m treading water. Instead, I’ve decided when it happens to lie on my back and see what happens. Maybe I’ll be able to do something small, or maybe I’ll just relax while I have a moment to float. Tomorrow is soon enough to start swimming again.

I’m just treading …

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