The 2012 Act Three Journey of an Actress/Coach/Writer.

Day 78 All Good Things.

Posted by themirrenlee on 18/03/2012

Jetstar is usually the company I fly with. They're the low budget offshoot of Qantas.

All good things.

Come to an end eventually. Not to be negative; it doesn’t mean there aren’t more good things around the corner. It’s just that it’s true nothing lasts forever. That’s not the way of life.

For me, my visit here in Sydney ends on Tuesday afternoon, when I fly back to Melbourne. I’ve had such a relaxing time, and have such big tasks facing me when I get back, with moving house being at the top of the list, that I am tempted to say, naw, I’ll stay here, thanks very much.

However, Change and Progress are my main commitments this year, so like a shark, I just have to keep on swimming. One promise I’ve made to myself is that I will ask for help with my move. I never like to “bother” anybody, so I don’t ask, and yet I am surrounded by people who WILL help me if I just let them know I need it. And I will need it. My usual pattern is totally insane: I overwork physically, including lifting heavy objects, until the Fibromyalgia flares so badly I’m in bed for a week afterwards. Totally preventable. And totally a victim-like game to play.

I wrote yesterday about divorcing one’s family when they’re toxic, which I’ve done with most of them. Now it’s time to say how much I value the people I’ve chosen to keep in my life as family, starting with my two children, Sarah and David, and their partners, James and Katie, along with Nicky, my incredible grandson. Yes, I know, everyone feels their grandchildren are incredible, but I use the word in the factual sense of the word as he is a leukemia survivor, which he contracted at age six. We fought a long, hard battle together, and it was both a very dark time and a very close time for all of us. It’s said that something like 80% of relationships don’t survive fighting a life threatening illness, and the other 20% get closer. Luckily, that’s what happened with us.

Nicky is about ten here, with a few of his extensive bear collection lined up behind him. Bear from "Bear in the Big Blue House" became his constant companion and comfort during his treatment. He said Bear had "nookemia", too, and the hospital staff made sure that he got all the "same" treatments as Nicky, even making him a matching plastic mask that had to be worn during the brain radiation. Incredible medical caring.

Nicky is now twelve years old, and makes Lego stop motion movies, which he’s been doing since he was nine (and just finishing treatment). He has his own website, and YouTube channel! He just won a first place award in an online short film stop motion contest that had seventy entries, and then got a special mention the next day from another video website. (If you’re curious, go to his channel and have a look at “Smile”, his winning entry: NickyMcVay’s Channel – YouTube.)

The reason this is all so incredible, besides his young age, is that after he had brain radiation “they” said he might have a lowered IQ, and cognitive difficulties. We were not encouraged to believe he would ever be able to read or write properly. We ignored the experts (as I am prone to do), and he started to read around the age of seven, exactly like his father (who had dyslexia), by starting with comic books. Then he got really motivated by wanting to read what was on the TV or movie screens, culminating in wanting to write his own scripts. He now reads and writes prolifically. Take that, experts!

As a result of the strong team we became, all working together to get through the dark days, I am wonderfully close to Nicky. I keep telling him that now he’s becoming a teenager, he’s not allowed to grow apart from me! We have such fun together. He likes me to play shooting games with him – first cap guns and now Nerf ones – and he’s very understanding when I say my stamina is finished for the moment after a fierce battle. We invent stories together, he reads to me (take that, experts!), and we go to the mall together to look at the latest Lego products, after which he says we should have coffee and a chat! You can imagine how much I miss him by living in another state.

Luckily, we have much better and easier ways to keep closely in touch nowadays than just via the telephone. Of course, we Skype each other and say hi on our webcams, and the flights are only an hour between cities. Thanks to other companies finally breaking the monopoly Qantas had on the industry years ago, which even made them offer a low budget alternative themselves, it is cheaper to fly than to go by bus or train, or use petrol in a 10-12 hour drive.

I come back about every three months to see my doctor, so I’ll be back for Nicky’s thirteenth birthday in June. In the meantime, I have a lot of ducks to get in a row, which include:

  • Increase my writing time.
  • Re-start acting and voice coaching.
  • Fine tune setting up this website.
  • Finalize partially completed articles.
  • Finish first voice coaching book: on American dialects.

As I wrote the other night, no feeling overwhelmed. I’ll be taking it “bird by bird”, and enjoy the process as I go along.

So one good thing comes to an end, and other good ones are coming up. I can’t wait to move back to the island atmosphere I used to live in – I’m looking forward to the quiet! I just have to see myself on the other side of the transition, and not stress about the move itself.

The journey continues.

I’m just swimmin’ …

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